My Testimony

The Beginning

I started my Christian walk just before my 21st birthday in 1978 in a gold mining town in South Africa. I was new on the mines and a working colleague and I were stuck in a classroom together learning the Bantu language so we could communicate with the Bantu migrant workers. It was a miracle in that the gold mines do not employ people with criminal records, yet this guy I was studying with was just six months out of jail for house theft.

I was intrigued with his story but then he started telling me about Jesus, which really irritated me. But after eight days of being shut up in a classroom with this ex-con, I started seeing that he had changed from what his former self was, and so I started listening more attentively. It wasn’t long after that that I became a Christian myself.

Back then the Charismatic movement was starting to make headway with the “Jesus Only” movement, popularized by the famous gospel songwriter / singer Larry Norman. Being a musician myself, I was drawn to the movement and joined in the outreach group in our town, street witnessing and being a pain for people in the street and at work where I witnessed tirelessly to others’ annoyance but with some success.

However, the leaders I once looked up to fell from grace one by one and left me disillusioned. I left our church and town and headed for the coast drifting from job to job, while trying to look for answers that made sense. I wandered from church to church, asking questions that no one had logical answers to, and so I settled into the rut of church-attending and conned myself into believing that since I was baptised and spoke in so-called “tongues” and confessed the Name of Christ that I was ok. But for years my conscience was not settled.

Years later I stopped wandering from job to job and settled down as a family man. I joined a large church of some thousand plus members and quietly kept out of trouble by keeping silent about my questions.

The Change

But then I inherited unwanted Christian books which sat on my shelves collecting dust, until one day I decided to read one of them. These books were from old-school Christianity when holiness meant something for the Christian. I read one book, then another, until I was reading five books at a time including my Bible. I spent hours a day devouring these books, cross-referencing them with others and my Bible, and praying well into the morning many nights. But I couldn’t believe what I was reading. There were real people who lived like the Christians we read about in the Bible.

Then came the questions again

But my questions haunted me so I started presenting them to my new leaders who once again could not answer them satisfactorily. So, I started knocking on doors of other pastors around the large area I lived in, to the extent that the pastors got together to discuss the Hugh problem; which was my disturbing questions about what they were preaching. This spanned Catholics, Calvinists, Armenians, I even debated with the head of the JW’s for our province. No one could give satisfactory answer to my questions.

Some questions:

  • Why did God make the physical / materialistic realm when He already had the spiritual?
  • Why did God make natural man when He already had myriads of angels who wouldn’t sin against Him?
  • Why did God, who hates sin, make man as the cherished creation, knowing that he would sin against Him?
  • Where in the Bible does it say just once that true believers are sinners?
  • How can they preach that believers will never lose their salvation when scripture clearly and repeatedly states that we live in the hope of salvation, which is to materialise at Christ’s coming and judgement?
  • How can they preach that we can never escape from sinning in this life when God promised that Jesus came to set us free from the power of sin (Matt 1:21)?
  • How do they explain that Christians DO NOT believe in a polytheistic god, yet preach that God exists in three separate persons, none of which is the other?
  • Did Jesus die in the flesh only and not in the spirit? Where does it say that?
  • How do they say that Jesus is “fully man and fully God” (an absurdity in the expression itself), yet without being able to give even one in-context verse in scripture.
  • If we die before we repent of our last sin, will we get to heaven when the Bible clearly states that our sin separates us from God?
  • If all are born sinners and are condemned to hell because of it, except for those who supposedly have salvation thrust on them without their consent, (like Calvinist preach), then how cruel is God to send innocent infants to hell just for being born?
  • If the Bible says that no one gets to see the Father in peace unless they are sanctified (Heb 12:14), then when are we able to be assured of our sanctification if it’s a never-ending process that many believe?

I could go on and on, but my posts will answer these troubling questions reasonably and biblically. This will give you a peace with the knowledge of the truth of these matters.

After 40 Years

After 40+ years of professing Christ, with much study, and probably too many debates, I have realised that God is reasonable. And He has translated that reasoning to anyone with an honest heart that desires truth, no matter where it may lead them. And for those who find it, also find themselves estranged from the common church circles. Nevertheless, they obtain as a result, a peace that transcends understanding – a peace that the church in general cannot have.

I love the church of God. For it is the life blood of Christ on earth. However, I am saddened at its poorly state. And I have come to realise that Christ is not saving the universal church of self-professing Christians. Only those who choose to do His will in loving obedience are the ones He will receive. These are far and few between. And as God has said that He will take one from a town and another one from a family, etc. But like the flood, Sodom and Gomorrah, Israel from Egypt, few there are in number who will finally be saved.

This site is dedicated to help those find the answers that many cannot answer.